wait until their weak, then pounce

San Francisco and California. Sheesh. Wait until the economy is hurting and then drop the "you can put your weed in it" budget fix.

Mr. Tom Ammiano, former San Francisco supervisor, on again off again mayoral candidate, current state assemblyman and, apparently, pothead has a budget fix for the entire universe:

GET STONED AND FORGET ABOUT IT DUDES!!!

You commie, homo-loving sons-of-a-gun

yep. california, my friends. it's not enough that the gays run everything, but hollywood (note: in california) thinks it's important enough to boast to itself and the world that they're a bunch of commie pinkos.

oh yeah, and the whole damned movie is about gay politicians.

fuzzy marinara sauce from california

If you're wondering why your tomato sauce tastes fuzzy, it's because california has been selling mold to you instead. The Bou' will admit to being more creeped out by the fact that apparently selling moldy sauces doesn't concern the FDA, but this blog isn't about kicking the FDA out of the union, it's about kicking California out of the union, lest I have to remind you.

why leave all the poopy water to the southerners?

sausalito, land of rich white people and gagillion dollar seaside h.... hey waitaminnit! didn't I just write about this?

no, it turns out that I didn't - Marin county's own Sausalito was apparently so appalled at those tan, smug bastards in southern california that they decided to poop in their own pool to show 'em who's who.

SO TAKE THAT LA JOYA!!!

children swimming in seal feces

Oh mommy! Mommy! Let's go! Let's go!!!

The city of gagillion dollar seaside homes is tired of spending money arguing with the spoiled parents of spoiled children about dangerous wildlife that has historically utilized the area's coastal regions for millions of years so they have made it legal for seals to poop in pools. I know it's confusing how having seals lawfully permitted to poop in a pool your child is using would make a lawsuit go away, and in all likelihood it will not, but the environmentalists are barking (seals bark you know) on one side and the poopaphobic parents are screaming gagillion dollar poop abatement plan on the other. I mean, what's a seaside resort community of entitlement and crass consumption to do?

+ =

The Bou' wants to know where to get those Prada seal bashing clubs!

when drugs being prohibited at athletic events is news...

....you have a problem.

and I (do and) don't mean this:



but really san francisco, is this newsworthy? and does the paper have to pretend like it's the end of the world? I mean, the bou' knows your subscriptions are down, but sheesh.

which dickhead thought of this?

Seriously, a fuzzy man-sized penis?

If BART cops can do it, so can Fresno cops

The Bou's favorite part about the whole story is how the chief of police's first concern seems to be telling everyone that the cops were justified. I'm sure it'll be a fair investigation.

dude, what we like need is like some bong sports

The San Francisco CHRONICal. I mean, the Bou' doesn't need to say anything else.

pass it to the left hand side.

California - the land of opportunity

and slavery. awesome.

not one but two

The Bou' noticed that when Forbes released its crappiest cities in the United States of America list that not one but two California cities (surprisingly close to each other) made the list.

Well, congratulations are certainly in order for both Stockton (#1 baby!) and Modesto (will have to settle for #5, but did beat Flint Michigan fer chrissake), but the Bou' wonders if we shouldn't just consider the entire central valley one giant crapasaurus rex of a city, I mean it's only a matter of time before all the orchards are converted to track houses right?

I would like the santa pez dispenser

and while you're at it, would you mind running my state?

yep. the Bou' is amazed, from selling chotchkes on the internets to trying to run the worlds Xth largest economy - ladies and gentlemen: Meg Whitman.

when the judges tell you to free all the prisoners...

you are doing something wrong.

yes, the very same people that send people to the jail are telling the state to let them go, because there is just so much awesome crime in California. (technically this may not be there actual reason, but it's hard to tell).

I will point out that it has to be cheaper for the state to have less people in jail, unless that's where all the firefighters come from.

california - where boyscouts kill

it's hard not to appreciate the verve with which california's boyscouts kill animals - stewards of the land, but obviously not the water - here is a great story about california's finest little merit badgers doing their very best to remain above the law while they kill kill kill.