for a brief moment I thought "so...?"

...then I figured out the siblings who locked their retarded sister in a shed were not ten years old, but in their 40s and 50s.

ahhhh....the peninsula.

it would take a californian to think this is news

Yup, the LA Times is blown away that a bunch of goddamned hippies are buying all the Priuses. Well, duh.

Next you're going to tell me that people driving around drunk are more likely to smash into a random building full of stoners - oh wait.

See, what the LA Times has forgotten is that the rest of the United States of Americans already knows that California is the most Californian place in the world.

Duh people - it's called California for a reason.

i think i look just like my pet torture contest

good idea san francisco: force people to make their pets look like they think they look themselves.

will someone please stop this?

wait until their weak, then pounce

San Francisco and California. Sheesh. Wait until the economy is hurting and then drop the "you can put your weed in it" budget fix.

Mr. Tom Ammiano, former San Francisco supervisor, on again off again mayoral candidate, current state assemblyman and, apparently, pothead has a budget fix for the entire universe:

GET STONED AND FORGET ABOUT IT DUDES!!!

which dickhead thought of this?

Seriously, a fuzzy man-sized penis?

i have an idea - let's put guns in the projects!

great idea. from san francisco of course.

no comment on the over/under

When the Bou' saw the headline "Man Accused of Selling Daughter for Cash, Beer" he knew California was involved. The question was: Northern or Southern California? It's pretty obvious that there are a great many possible areas in California where this could happen from the deep woods of northern Siskayou county to the meth trailers of southern Kern county.

Well, it turns out that Greenfield is pretty much exactly on the line dividing northern and southern California.

after I get a tattoo on my forehead, I'm gonna burn grandma

it seems reasonable when you live in california to do things that other people might not understand.

apparently one of these things includes making a necklace of your mother's skull and cremating her in a culvert on your farm.

these types of things happen all the time in california.

It's not just san francisco that's got flamers folks

Redding California apparently does too.

Yep, a squirrel with a rainbow speedo apparently got hopped up on amyl nitrate and started a fire in Redding.

IS NOTHING SACRED ANYMORE????

In related news, for the first time ever, dry vegetation was sparked in northern California that was not marijuana. True.

i want everything - nothing less

it take a minute(man) to be retarded enough for an entire lifetime

yes, the minutemen, not the totally awesome band from san pedro, but the "border vigilantes" from san diego, have come up to san francisco to protest a policy that was recinded well before they ever showed up.

while you're at it, let's go to germany and protest WWII. good idea.

what do californians do when people are rude to waitresses?

STAB THEM!!!

I should clarify that by californians we mean undocumented hondurans, but you get the point.

the moral of the story: if you don't like being called "hon" don't come to california.

en lo que pensamos sobre la celebración del cinco de mayo

Este pagina es in español. QUE GUAPA NO?

it's also possible that for some reason today Safari decided I was in Spain.

By the way, I want to point out that Spain used to own California.

It's true. So says Jimmy Wales.

Lest I forget la mission de este organizacion, la pagina de propinas.

Oh, and just to piss of the Spanish (aside from mangling their language), I'm using the "Search in Basque" function of the google.es page, so take THAT you Eusk-haters.

presidential support stickers in foreign languages or alphabets

so far I have seen Obama and Hillary bumper stickers in spanish and hebrew.

I will confess that I have no idea what language george bush supporters are speaking but, whatever it is, I'm sure the w they use counts too.

I want to emphasize that if California were kicked out of the union this is unlikely to continue.

Celebrating 4/20 in a field with stinky hippies

I don't have to do anything more than point to these pictures.

Frankly, I don't see why they called the police, it looks like they should have called a fire truck based on all the weed those kids were burning.

Talk about a grass fire.

cars driven by vegetarians that smell like chicken

I shouldn't have to do anything other than shudder after writing that title, but I will instead paint a picture:

Highway 1, somewhere between Santa Cruz and Half Moon Bay.

There are clouds scattered across the sky that seem to float despite the firm, salty breeze that blows your organic wool knitted scarf as you gaze upon the pelicans and cormorants from your cliftop roadside perch.

You sigh as you think about how terrible it is that just a few hundred miles south of here there are oil derricks ruining the view of the channel islands. Form a moment you wonder if you should wait until the sun sets, but then you shiver and realize your almond milk latte may still be warm so you turn around and head back to your either 27 year old Mercedes 300 (pre-83, you note, because it's easier to run SVO with the older engines) or your 2002 Jetta TDI wagon with the custom veggie tank in the back.

You get in, take a sip (it IS still warm, thank goddess), turn the key to warm those little glow plugs, start her up and pull out onto the highway in a black cloud of chicken scented smoke.

As you pull away I can almost make out the "all who wander are not lost" bumper sticker from under the soot.

tu ciudad!

look. the mexicans think they have pretty much taken over anyway, so kicking out the state is pretty much a no brainer no? Look, at that point it becomes california's problem, not minnesota's.



pretty much all of that mexico loving and reconquistization is happening in california folks. here's scientific proof.