channel your inner puke

namaste! and greetings from the California department of WTF.

The only thing more Californian than the wanderlust festival is... well. I guess I might as well just shut this site down. This pretty much takes the cake. vegan cake mind you.

now go buy some medicine for the crabs you got last weekend.

they don't make tin hats for stealing...

...but damnit, they should.

So, the Bou' has to wonder what the root word for TRUSTee is in California because clearly, there is no traditional requirement for being trustworthy. Proof:

"The man planted the stolen ketchup bottle by my bike".

In all fairness the Bou' does support bike riding.

it would take a californian to think this is news

Yup, the LA Times is blown away that a bunch of goddamned hippies are buying all the Priuses. Well, duh.

Next you're going to tell me that people driving around drunk are more likely to smash into a random building full of stoners - oh wait.

See, what the LA Times has forgotten is that the rest of the United States of Americans already knows that California is the most Californian place in the world.

Duh people - it's called California for a reason.

it's not the answer that's blowin' in the wind

malibu, the place what brings you the best barbi EVAR and, now, stories of Bob Dylan surrounding himself with poop.

what a load of crap all around.

fuzzy marinara sauce from california

If you're wondering why your tomato sauce tastes fuzzy, it's because california has been selling mold to you instead. The Bou' will admit to being more creeped out by the fact that apparently selling moldy sauces doesn't concern the FDA, but this blog isn't about kicking the FDA out of the union, it's about kicking California out of the union, lest I have to remind you.