why are there no good flintstones metaphors for witness intimidation?

Seriously. The Bou' spent some considerable effort trying to come up with a good metaphor for witness intimidation based on the cartoon show called the flintstones. (you know, the ones from the town of bedrock).

There just aren't any.

And that may be why Eric Safire, who appears to be a real son of a bitch and not a very good lawyer at the same time, decided to intimidate witnesses while actually in the court room.

Given that we already started with the story of a diamond encrusted bam bam pendant, it was not likely that this case could get any more retarded, but apparently California would like us to reconsider.

I apologize for being tardy

to the whole "miss california usa" thing, but want to point out that I am not the only one with tard in the title on this one.

The Bou' has learned on good authority that Miss USA is apparently the "ghetto beauty pageant" so it should only seem natural that this spectacular story seems perfectly tailored for some quality "opinion journalism" from all sides.

nothing says I'm sorry like a dildo with your pink slip

Even California's porn industry is hurting (not in the fun way either) in this down economy.

But there's a glimmer of hope, and it's not astrolube: sex toys appear to be buckin' the trend.

first nancy reagan, now gavin newsome

yeesh. gavin newsome, he of ass sex blessing fame, got hitched by a psychic.

why wasn't this news when he got married?

why did i have to wait until an article about her predictions of his future in politics and reproductive practices to find out?

is it because calfiornia is retarded?

yes. yes it is.